Five months later, Honey I’m HOME!! -Or am I?
It is a mixture of comforting and weird to be back in California. Nothing seems to have changed here, however shifts have occurred within me causing me to look at the same stuff in a different light. I am in the process of reinventing my whole idea on employment&business; currently working toward creating a lucrative passion filled lifestyle for myself. Along with the mental shift I am making professionally I am digesting the fact that since mid February I have been clinging – way too tightly – to a partnership that developed while I was gone. Up until a shift that occurred just this morning after I lamely reached out once more, I had been desperate for communication and fully unable to wrap my mind around letting go and allowing the relationship space to breathe…
I know I know, super UN-YOGA of me. #human
In this transition back from exploring uncharted territories I am entering a season of new beginnings. It is a daily challenge slowing down the wheels in my brain, I feel like I should always be doing something business wise to move forward. It is more important now than ever that I slow down and prioritize developing my mind-body connection far beyond my yoga practice on the mat, and work toward intergrading it through out my whole life. In a sense I am an adrenaline junkie- I recognize that so much of me thrives on going fast; speed makes me feel invincible, alert, focused, engaged and carefree. It’s almost like the “need for speed” causes me to try and rush the un-rushable. However I am starting to realize speed is a quickly fading high; you can’t harness the exhilaration or focus you get from speeding through anything and expect quality or retention in the results.
The full spectrum of my life as I know it is taking on new forms, new priorities and goals. Some of it is rejuvenating and thrilling; other aspects have me highly vulnerable. A few things I have done recently that are all new to me include…
Applied for a business license.
Created a webpage.
Applied to teach at a few festivals.
Got business insurance.
Was interviewed and featured in a small news article.
Developed a studio menu that has dynamic services I created to offer the community, that implement my esthetic skills and yoga teaching abilities all in one.
Was warmly welcomed into a studio space with many other talented women that follow their passions.
Started up weekly park yoga classes for the community.
Made heaps of flyers and coupons, then went door-to-door + windshield-to-windshield promoting myself.
I will say, none of these things were done with 100% ease, confidence, or certainty. Taking leaps into the business world is daunting. There is an element if risk involved when your stepping into business for yourself that isn’t a part of the picture when you work for another person and thus far in my adult life I have only known the role of “employee”.
You have to possess a certain amount of mental toughness to throw yourself into the world in this way. For instance, for a moment I tried to talk myself out of going door to door with the flyers I had just made. Seems silly but doubt started to creep in hard and a voice of fear quietly suggested, “I would be waisting my time and resources because most of these people wouldn’t be into yoga anyway.” It took a second of sitting with the heavy feeling that thought gave me to realize what a failure breeding thought it was, and if I were to listen to it then I may as well just put my apron on and drive to a restaurant right now because there is no way I’ll ever make something of my passion with that kind of attitude. Grateful for recognizing the broke thinking I slipped my sneakers on and distributed the flyers. During that walk I introduced myself to some people that were moving into the neighborhood and the woman I chatted with expressed interest; we exchanged information. That interaction and the fact that I was able to silence the doubt in my mind bred a new confidence from within me. The more I am willing to take risks and put myself out there, the more opportunity I have at reaching people who will take interest in what I am offering.
While there a massive appeal in the fact that there is no cap on what I can create there is also no guarantee that I will create or when. In the very beginning stages of laying the ground work there is a lot more expending than creating; it is intimidating.
-Insert slew of cliche one liners here-
If it is to be it is up to me.
All good things take TIME.
Go slow to go fast.
It’s all cliche for a reason; the populous agrees on it. You have to have a whole lot of faith and patience to build anything with substance in this world. I can afford to develop more of both of those characteristics and I intend on doing so.
Certainly building a clientele won’t happen over night but I know that I have found my niche in this world and the people who are supposed to join me will. Even though I was the only one who attended my first week of yoga classes in the park I didn’t let it get me down. I am eager to share yoga because I see the infinite ways it can improve mental and physical health. I am a living example of it. I have a long way to go on my path of individual growth and development but I think it is important to start sharing the journey and spreading that lightness with as many as possible.
Maybe in a few months my next piece will be titled “Started from the bottom now I’m here!!” haha I kid I kid.
Thanks for tuning in. XO